Have you ever come across something so absurdly funny that you just had to stop and take a picture? Maybe it’s a typo on a restaurant menu or a ridiculous road sign, but you can’t help but crack up. Well, fear not, our fellow chuckle-seekers, because we’ve compiled a collection of the funniest signs that are guaranteed to tickle your funny bone. So sit back, relax, and get ready for some serious laughs.Â
Caution: Smartphone Zombies Crossing
If you’re one of those people that can’t stand it when someone can’t take their eyes off their phone, then this is the sign for you. Someone put up a sign in a neighborhood that asked people to “beware of smartphone zombies.” It’s probably just asking drivers to be careful and be on the lookout for pedestrians that aren’t paying attention, but it’s pretty funny nonetheless. It’s also a good way to get drivers to pay attention to the sign.
Now, if only they could figure out a way to get people from becoming entranced by their phones while walking down the road. You might see a sign like this coming to a street near you soon enough.
When You Use Google Translate to Write Your Signs
This post actually contains multiple funny signs. We’re not sure where exactly it is or why it even exists, but we’re glad it does. The first sign in the photo advises people to call the police if they’re stolen, which might be hard for obvious reasons but anyway. Our favorite is probably the sign in the back, though. It reads: “Avoid rude and unreasonable chicken.”
Whoever wrote that must’ve already mastered life by now. Another advises people to keep safe because “the slippery are very crafty.” They sure are, they sure are.
He’s Always Watching
If you ever wanted to make someone feel weirded out and like they are constantly being watched, just put this sign up in your place. It’s basically a sign that looks like Jesus with text that says, “I saw that.” It’ll even hang conveniently from your door if you have nowhere else to put it. We’ve never felt so guilty for doing so little after looking at this sign.
It’s also hard not to imagine there is a small camera installed somewhere in this sign. Placing a small, discrete fake camera somewhere on here might be the only way to make it better.
Everybody Loves A Good Pun (or Three)
If puns aren’t your thing, then you might want to pay special attention to this sign because we promise it will make you a pun lover. And if you already love puns, then you’re welcome. Someone wrote this sign for what is seemingly a bar. It reads: “Alcohol is not in my Vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on Whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much, it’s likely Tequilya.” That’s pretty great.
However, despite the great puns throughout this sign, it’s probably not the best business practice for a bar to remind its customers that the alcohol they’re being served is likely to make them hit the bucket earlier.
This Is Why Punctuation and Grammar Are Important
There have already been a couple of signs on this list with some grammar mistakes, but none quite like this. The sign is in bright red, and it reads exactly: “Elephants please stay in your car.” It’s not hard to guess that someone wanted to warn people to stay in their cars because there might be elephants nearby. However, without punctuation, it reads as if it’s asking elephants to stay in their cars.
We all know elephants don’t drive, so it’s not hard to get the meaning, but it does show what can happen when you remove the odd comma or two.
$200 Fine (if You Don’t Kick the Bucket First)
This sign gets pretty serious pretty quickly. However, it then just makes you second guess everything about it. The sign warns people against touching wires, which it says causes “instant death.” It even has the skull and bones adorned on either side. However, it then tells you that there will be a “$200 fine” for such actions. How would there be a fine if you’re likely to be dead instantly?
Also, where is the Newcastle Tramway Authority? That sounds like a place in the U.K., but if so, why would they be using a dollar figure instead of pounds? So many questions here.
Cats Are Teenagers in Animal Form
If you’re looking to drive traffic to your veterinary clinic, this sign might be your answer. It explains that dogs prepare people for babies while cats prepare parents for teenagers. And while dogs are great, they’re still sort of like large, clumsy babies, which is part of the reason we love them so much. Cats, on the other hand, are a different story. They can be moody and anti-social, just like teenagers.
We aren’t sure if this sign was the work of an employee or the business owner but hats off to whoever came up with it because it really does capture the difference between dogs and cats.
We Also Can’t Believe They Had to Make This Sign
When you go out into nature for something like a camping or hiking trip, it’s general knowledge that you should dig a hole and use the bathroom there if you need to. However, this park was apparently having issues with people going between the massive stone boulders. And nobody wants to come across human waste during their hiking down a trail. The sign even laments the fact they had to put a sign up in the first place.
It reads: “Please do not poop in the rocks.” A disclaimer follows: “We can’t believe we had to make this sign.” They really sound fed up with people going on the trail.
Armed Dinosaurs? No. Dinosaurs With Flowers? Yes
We aren’t too sure who this sign’s target audience is, nor are we sure where exactly it was hanging, but it’s pretty hilarious nonetheless. It shows a T-rex holding two pistols with a forbidden symbol in red on the left. On the right, the T-rex is holding flowers inside, a symbol showing that this is allowed. So, yeah, we aren’t sure if this would deter an adult from bringing a gun somewhere, but it might encourage a small child to swap out their handgun for some roses.
It’s also a mystery as to how this T-rex was able to pick up either gun or flower with those tiny arms, but it looks hilarious holding either.
Teacher Of The Year (Not)
Teachers are arguably some of the best when it comes to making hilarious signs, but we’ve never seen a classroom sign with the same level of dry humor as this. A music teacher made a list apologizing for being “a mean, demanding, and slightly obsessive music teacher.” They also promised to “try to be nicer in the future” before informing their students that the above “are lies” and that they should go practice more.
The teacher might be slightly obsessive, but with a sign like this, we wouldn’t mind having them teach us a thing or two about music. It just shows that they’re dedicated.
It’s Just Chemistry, Man
No smoking signs are pretty common these days. The logic is simple, but there might be instances where people just seem to completely ignore such signs. This dock owner had a pretty clever way of conveying his no-smoking rule to customers, and he did it using the most simple terminology possible. His sign reads: “Absolutely no smoking, fire + fuel = kaboom!” It’s pretty hard to put it anymore, but then that.
However, knowing people, we’d be surprised if every single person to dock here ended up following the rule. Smoking is just one of those things that are hard to control.
Someone’s Been Bullying the Staff
Apart from being one of the most random signs on this list, it probably has one of the best backstories. Sadly, we don’t know the backstory, but the sign itself reads: “Please do not throw cabbages at our staff.” Why the employees would put this up in a random spot in the freezer or even put it up at all is anyone’s guess.
However, it now begs the question of what can you throw at the staff if not for cabbage? Those other items in the freezer look a bit hard.
Who Said It’s Only for Happy Hour?
Restaurant signs are usually pretty dull. They might list their item of the day, a special, or that they’re hiring. However, this restaurant managed to find a way to grab people’s attention while giving them exactly what they wanted. The sign simply reads “Soup of the day,” followed by the word “tequila.” It’s smart because many of the people going to a restaurant called Little Mexico are probably in the mood for drinks involving that particular ingredient, anyway.
Of course, a sign like this doesn’t bode well for the quality of their food, but when you have tequila, who really cares, right?
We’re Pretty Sure You’re Not Allowed to Sell That
Someone out shopping for some furniture spotted this jumbled collection of words. It reads, and in this order: “Buy Bed Free 1 Night Stand”. We’re guessing it means that you get a free nightstand, as in a table, if you buy a bed. However, it’s not hard to imagine an alternate meeting for this particular set of words. We’ll let you figure this one out. Hint: they definitely shouldn’t be advertising that.
You kind of understand what they mean to say, but it’s still funny nonetheless.
Guilting People Into Happy Hour? Genius Marketing
Mexican restaurants really seem to know their customer base. This sign from a restaurant called El Arroyo in Texas reads: “Treat your mom to a margarita. You’re probably the reason she drinks.” It’s kind of hard to argue with that logic, especially if, like some people, you were only going there for the drinks, anyway. We’re sure their food is good, but how could you not have a margarita or two while you’re there?
Some people who saw this sign were quick to point out how the sign should’ve included husbands on that list of why people drink. But that’s just another sign idea for another time.
They Definitely Should’ve Written GOLF Balls
Golf courses aren’t usually known for their sense of humor. When you picture a golf course, the first thing that usually comes to mind is a stuffy country club. However, this golf course sign proves they aren’t all like that. It reads: “Coronavirus Be Aware” at the top, followed by “Do not touch other players balls. Wash your hands after touching your own balls!” We’ll let you make of that what you will.
We’re surprised someone managed to get this sign past management, but we’re glad they did. A little sense of humor is needed when trying to get people to pay attention to virus precautions.
The Clarification We All Needed
It’s not every day you have a conversation in your head with a pair of doors. But that’s exactly what these two signs make you do as soon as you start reading them. The sign on the right door seems normal enough and advises people to use the other door. However, the sign on the left door reads: “I am the other door.” It’s kind of hard not to just feel like you were talking to an actual person there.
It’s also kind of hard not to start searching for a deeper meaning in the wording used for this set of signs. Does the door on the left feel used? Is there something else going on here?
We Had No Idea This Is How Wind Chimes Are Made
This sign might be the most creative one yet. Someone hung a sign in a store above some wind chimes, which explains the popular product’s backstory. It reads, “Wind chimes are made from the metallic bones of robots that tried to overthrow us. Hang them outside your house as a warning to others.” It’s a little dark, but to be honest, that’s what makes it so hilarious and unexpected.
Of all the items to link to a robot apocalypse, wind chimes actually make the most sense. We’re going to think back to this sign every time we hear wind chimes from now on.
This Mile Marker Says “419.99” Because “420” Kept Getting Stolen
Here is another case of government employees having to get a bit inventive in order to get people not to do something. Colorado is one of the few states in the U.S. to legalize the sale of a particular plant beloved by some, so it’s not really a surprise that mile marker 420 kept getting stolen. So, in order to keep people from stealing their sign and also mark the road, they put up a mile marker that read: “Mile 419.99”.
However, to be honest, this is probably the only mile marker 419.99 in the entire country, so one would think that anyone who wants a really unique sign would be dying to snatch this one up.